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A Perfect Wedding, If You Ignore All the Details.
A Case Study in Letting Go of Control.
almost nothing went according to plan… and yet somehow, it still ate.
Like, logistically? A disaster.
Emotionally? Unreal. 10/10. Would absolutely... do it again..?(second husband will be a court house wedding)
It honestly started before the wedding even began.
You know how you ask people to RSVP and you’re like “just let me know either way!”
And then someone hears that and thinks, or I could simply not respond at all..
No RSVP. No text. No “so sorry can’t make it.”
Just… nothing! HAHa lol so funny...
Which, I have to say, is a very specific personality type.
And while we’re here,
weddings are also a fascinating social experiment..
There were people we didn’t invite (no bad blood, just… capacity, reality, life), and it was actually so telling watching the reactions.
Some people get it. They’re normal. They’re like, “of course, love you guys, have the best time.”
And then others… somehow make your wedding about them.
Which is ironic. And also a little bit insane.
But again, revealing. Educational, even!
Then we had our welcome dinner,
At one point, someone gave a speech who was not asked to give a speech… and also did not ask.
And honestly? That level of confidence should be studied.
Not cool.
We also had promised an open bar.
And to be fair- it was open.
Until it very abruptly… wasn’t.
Like a full personality switch. One second it’s “what can I get you?” and the next it’s “you don’t have to go home but you absolutely cannot stay here.”
Lights on. vibe off. Energy revoked.
We were lovingly, but firmly, evicted, also my first time, just to clarify!
The next morning we got ready together with our friends, which I would absolutely recommend.
It was chaotic, loud, fun, very “we’re all in this together.”
The florist also made a quick AND LOVELY appearance!!
No “congrats,” just a full up & down look, a pause, and then asked if I had been married before.
Like… I’m sorry, what part of this moment gave that energy? lmao
Which is such a specific thing to say to a bride mid-getting-ready...
Did we run behind?
....Obviously.
Did that mean we didn’t get photos before the ceremony?
...Also obviously.
At that point I was operating on vibes and maybe half a beechers cheese stick & salami, so expectations were already, I’ll take what I can get!
And then… the ceremony..
It rained. The entire time.
… committed, persistent rain.
Which meant no chairs. Everyone stood
Fully present. Slightly soaked. Still supportive.
(We love you all endlessly for that. You really earned that dinner.)
Also, super fun, airplanes!
Multiple.
Nothing like trying to have a heartfelt moment while a plane absolutely cuts through it overhead. Very grounding. Very “you are not the main character today.”
Somewhere in the middle of all of this, I also forgot my dad while walking down the aisle.
Yes.
I got to the bottom of the stairs, where I was supposed to link arms with my dad… and I just kept walking.
Full tunnel vision.
Until he yelled my name and I turned around like oh my god, right, my dad! & then we finished the walk together <3
A reset. A second take. A live rehearsal you could say!
Our dogs, who in theory were going to be involved, decided they would actually prefer not to.
Emotionally present? Physically, they wanted out...
But, hey, we respect a boundary!
And instead of a big, cinematic ending, no last dance, no sparkler send-off, no curated goodbye moment. I got tired, got drunk, and my husband and I Irish exited our own wedding.YUp. Just… disappeared. woke up on our air bnb couch at 2am full glam! Honestly wore it into the next day, no shame!
And the funniest part is, none of it actually felt like anything was going wrong?
It just felt like the day… happening!
Because the truth is, we had already had our perfect moment.
We eloped last June at the Fairmont Olympic Hotel on our anniversary in the same place Alex proposed to me(awhh I know)
So this wasn’t about getting it “right.”
and it was exactly how it was supposed to be.
It was about celebrating something that already was𓆩ᥫ᭡𓆪
Every single person who showed up for us and from affar made that weekend so amazing. We felt so insanely loved & grateful. We have the best people in our lives(Mushyy but idc)
It was chaotic.
It was slightly unhinged.
It was a little bit all over the place.
It was fucking fun.
It was perfect<3
We wouldn’t change a single fucking thing.
Xoxo
The Rowes