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Cigarettes, Soft Grunge, and Emotional Damage.
Do We Miss When Everyone Was Hot and Depressed?
Tumblr was our original religion. We didn’t *follow* people; we curated each other’s personalities. Your reblogs said everything about your vibe, lace bralettes over vintage tees, American Apparel tennis skirts, messy buns that took 45 minutes, and a caption like *“idk, I’m fine”* under a black-and-white photo of someone smoking in a bathtub. We were the blueprint for every “clean girl” trend before it got baptized by TikTok and repackaged in beige. Don’t even get me started on the early 2000s comeback I’ve been praying for, the real one. Not the watered-down Y2K micro-trends, but the *cunty* 2000s: Von Dutch hats, bedazzled flip phones, Juicy Couture tracksuits that could legally double as emotional support wear. I want low-rise jeans that make me question my life choices and chunky highlights that look like I did them in my friend’s bathroom after crying about a MySpace boy.
The fashion had confidence before confidence was an aesthetic. We wore fake Chanel earrings, glossy lips, and zero irony. *Hot* wasn’t just an attitude.... it was a Fuckoiiing way of life. If your eyeliner didn’t smudge like a cry for help, were you even living?
Now everything’s beocming a little too minimal? SO curated. So quiet That even when I feel plain, it honesly pisses me off, and not in the i wanna try too hard way. We used to scream our personalities in rhinestones. I was in 5th Grade with a fucking bedazzled pink razor, I meanCmon now. I miss when people dressed like they were auditioning for a Lindsay Lohan movie that never got made. I miss being 17 and thinking Marc Jacobs Daisy was a lifestyle. I miss caring too much about everything(EHHHH thats maybe dramatic) my layout, my playlist, my self-diagnosed mysteriousness.
It’s not that I hate now, I just miss when cool didn’t have a step-by-step guide. When we were messy, dramatic, and took selfies with flash like our lives depended on it. When “I’m fine.” actually meant “I’m spiraling but in a leather jacket. and crushes on older boys who suck”. Bring back the Tumblr girl who posted cigarette photos but had asthma. Bring back the girls who lived on Red Bull and retail therapy. Bring back when fashion was less about clean lines and more about chaos management.
Maybe I don’t actually want to relive it.... maybe I just miss when it all felt a little more “real”. When your personality wasn’t an aesthetic, it was a mini survival tactic that “gave fuck you cunt” in the most effortless way.....
Until then, I’ll keep romanticizing the past, sometimes(heavy on the sometimes) and blasting Born to Die on my headphones, overlining my THIN lips, and pretending my Spotify playlist is a secret Tumblr account with 37 followers and a god complex.
Juicy Couture Velour Tracksuit- For when you want to look rich, hot.
Marc Jacobs “Daisy” Perfume- Smells like first heartbreak, lip gloss, and NOT dramatic.
Von Dutch Trucker Hat- Because nothing says confidence like early 2000s chaos energy.
Disposable Camera- For blurry nights that look better with flash and emotional instability.
Lip Smacker Gloss Set- The original lip gloss that could outshine your GPA.
Sequin Handbag- Because you don’t need to carry anything except attitude.
Chrome Hearts Sunglasses- For pretending you’re famous and avoiding eye contact from bitches at Trader Joe’s.
Jennifer Fisher Thread Hoops- Rich aunt energy. Looks expensive, feels hotter than your 2007 MySpace playlist.